Thursday, February 27, 2014

If I could talk to my 22 year old self

Hello!  Do you have a few minutes?  I’d sure like to talk to you a bit.

Please don’t be shocked, but what you see before you is YOU fifty years from now.  I know that at some point in the near future, you will adopt the belief that you are destined not to make it until your fortieth birthday. Please allow that fact to reveal to you exactly how wrong you can be.

I do not know how or who made this opportunity possible but please know that I am thankful for it. You have already made one very large mistake. You married at 19, have a two year old daughter, left them behind and joined the U. S Army.  Even now, your lonely, vengeful, young wife is pregnant and will bear another daughter.  Do you see how messy life can be when you rush at it like charging an enemy machine-gun position? Reckless is what you are right now. Reckless and stupid!

You couldn’t wait to be out in the world, living life as you thought best. Do you remember what that man who ran the Guest House at Ft. Sill tried to tell you?  You were stomping around, ranting loudly about how awful life was. Your wife surprised you with your baby girl, left home to be with you, where she thought a good wife should be.  You didn’t want them there. You were doing your best to run away from your responsibilities. That man said “Young fellow, this world doesn’t own you a thing. You will get out of your life exactly what you are willing to invest in it.  Hard work, dedication, honoring the commitments you make, not by blaming everyone but yourself.   
You wouldn’t hear it then … but the day will come when his words will ring truer than any other hard-learned lesson life will teach you. They don’t call learning about life your way, The School of hard knocks for nothing. Believe me when I say, in the near future you will not be any more receptive to good advice than you are at this moment. 

Hell mister, you won’t even consider yourself grown-up until you are thirty-one years old. By then you will have married and divorced your second wife with whom you were careless enough to impregnate twice. Three children to support and you barely have what passes for a job.

The road ahead is steep. In fact, some might define it as a mountain. But, have heart, you can overcome this formidable obstacle if you are willing to change, apply yourself and consider well the next steps you will take.

I know … you are asking yourself where one can find direction, reliable guidance and help.  You are not worthless or stupid, though some have implied as much.  You have been witness to excellent examples of how one should live life.  You Mother left you that tape. You listened to it, sobbing all the while.  She made some wild prophecies, visions of the future and you … you did not believe one word of it. 

The day will come when you grow tired of taking the wrong path and paying the penalties imposed by life.  You will not be thinking clearly then for you rely upon your own understanding. 

There is an aspect of life that you have ignored; put completely out of your consciousness. At a time when you have surpassed the limit of years you have imagined for your lifespan, you WILL have an experience that will expand your mind, vision, understanding and knowledge. From that point on, you WILL be changed.  You will be a new man. You will be introduced to the spiritual aspect of life.  You will become wiser than you ever imagined and creativity will flow through you like a rushing wind. You will discover your soul and know the source of all life. You will be inspired to write, you will have a difficult time accepting all the gifts you will be blessed with.

True love will come, love so strong and pure, you will at first doubt that it is possible for it to exist.  It will fill you to overflowing, so abundant that there will be enough to share with all the world.

The new man that you become will live a blessed life from then on. Be humble, gentle and receptive to the spirit world that is all around you. You will be tested. All blessed men are.  You will share that blessed life with another that will become one flesh. Two score plus years you will share with her … and then, eternity awaits both of you, full of love everlasting.

Your path through life will be well lit and certain. Your steps will be confident and sure.  Fear not for you have been faithful always.

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